Sunday, November 25, 2007

'How old do you think I am?' she asks coyly....

Do you remember those Oil of Olay ads that used to be on tv?
I haven't seen any for a while, but the actual product causes much joking in our family....every significant women's birthday warrants a bottle of 'Oil of Old Age' from my grandfather....funny stuff. Funny guy.
But I digress.....

I'm not a 'traditionally' lucky person....and by this I mean contests, lottos, that kind of thing. I always joke about being the only name in the hat and still not winning!!! Seriously.
Well, miracle of miracles, I won hockey tickets for two club seats on a draw at work. Needless to say, I was extremely pleases as well as surprised.

So we're at the hockey game, on Saturday night, it's the second period, and I ask my husband if he would like anything to snack. 'Sure I'll have some popcorn and a beer, thanks Babe'. So off I go to the concession stand. There's not a big line up since I went in the middle of the period... so I walk up to the clerk, who happens to be, I'd say late fifties early sixties, and ask her for a large buttered up popcorn and two beer.

'Can I see some i.d. please?'
BBbbbbbbbbahahahahaha.... she's a funny lady I'm thinking to myself.
So I laugh, well it's a blurting kind of a laugh, a blaugh if you will....
'Seriously???!!!' I exclaim, looking at the same time for the hidden camera.
'Seriously M'am, I need to see some i.d. or I can't sell you a beer'.
I just can't keep up the straight face...I look at the sign posted at the front counter that reads, We have the right to request i.d. on customers who look under 30
I say, ' while I sincerely appreciate the inadvertent compliment, I just turned 41, and I'd like a beer please'.....I got the shrug!! the shrug!!!!! (it's my own fault, I loathe to carry a purse and since hubby drove I didn't pack my licence).
'Okaaaay. I guess I'm having a diet coke then (Miss Kathy with a 'K')...my husband doesn't need all those empty calories anyway'.
That will be x amount of dollars....so I hand her my bank card (I rarely carry cash as well)...
'Sorry, we only take cash or credit cards'....again with the blaughing and a slight shake of the head.

'If you would be so kind to hold on to those items' I said in my sweetest voice, 'I will send my husband back with his wallet'...Thank yuuuuu.... and off I go back to our seats with such a look of such sheer puzzlement on my face that Mark couldn't resist to ask what had transpired since I came back empty handed....
Like HE looks any older than, oh, 25!!! (better be dishing out your i.d. buddy!!!)

So off he goes, much to the amusement of the people sitting behind us who just happened to eavesdrop in on our conversation...

So I guess I'm luckier than I first thought, especially in the genes.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Take That Tom Cruise

Quick, cue the Mission Impossible theme song….

It amazes me (after the fact of course) how easy they ‘they’ seem to make everything look in the movies.
Take like for example, scaling a wall and coming down the other side….who comes to mind – Tom Cruise, Catherine Zeta Jones, Ahnold, me….
Can you see where I’m going with this?

Part of my job includes being keeper of the keys….all keys.
Since these ‘said’ keys have been in disarray for numerous months before I even came on the scene to find one specific key sometimes is a monumental task. This is on my ‘to do list’ for over the Christmas break, while everyone else is on vacation. First, of course, I always try the ‘master’ key. This particular little gem works on every restricted lock assembly on the site…except, naturally, (Murphically speaking) for the door that needs to be opened.

How do you get the door open you ask?
Well, the most logical (ha-ha) would be to get the locksmith to open it…however, being a restricted access door, the process is a little more involved than just picking a lock. It involves drills and all sorts of nastiness that costs mucho dinero. What’s the alternative I ask? Well, if you get a ladder, climb up, lift the ceiling tiles, you can come down on the other side and open the door from the inside, thus negating the destruction of a $500 locking mechanism.

Sounds easy enough. Not.
Cue the theme music, I’m goin’ in!!!!
What????, you say. Are you out of your mind???? Apparently. Most certainly.

My maintenance guys are older than me, and were out making the site safe from slip and fall etc….it wasn’t the locksmith’s job to go all cloak-and-dagger. I can do this. How hard can it be? I’ve seen it done on TV…..Man, I’m a dolt, I admit it.


So I’m hangin over the door frame (not unlike the proverbial ‘sitting on the fence’) thinking “what the hell were you thinking”, that’s a pretty long way down….
But by this time, I’m kinda (more like really, really) stuck. Bite the bullet you wuss..

K, I can’t hear the theme music for the ringing in my ears and the voice in my head telling me how much this is going to hurt…
Let go, you’re like a cat, you’ll land on your feet….then I start to laugh hysterically, out of the shear ridiculousness of it all and out of fear and out of the fact that I got myself into this predicament so I really have no one to blame but myself.

Let go. Let go! Let go!!!!!
Crap, forgot to push out when I let go, so naturally (physically, as in the subject) weight drops in a straight line.
Swift.
Swift was the fall, swift was the hitting of my arms and wrists, swift was the bruising, swift was the cursing.
I think the cursing was swifter than the bruising…it was definitely more colorful….although…..

So now I’m wearing long sleeve shirts so that people won’t ask me if I’m an abused woman….

The best lessons are learned.

On the upside, the door is now unlocked, and I had it re-keyed to match my master key. Ha! Take that!

Friday, November 16, 2007

Spin Doctor....

Okay. I can spin with the best of them I would wager. Read and comment please, any improvements would be most welcome. This is the ad that we'll be submitting for the sale of our house, does it make you want to come take a look?...if it does, then I've done okay :)



From the moment you step inside the welcoming entryway, you will know you are home. Located on a quiet street in desirable Ranchlands, this beautiful three bedroom three bath townhome will certainly please. Let the natural light invite you to the spacious and open kitchen/dining area with oversized pantry. Relax in the warmth of the livingroom, patio doors to the balcony run the full width of the townhome, ample room for barbeque and patio furniture. Main floor powder room has plenty of storage space. Upstairs you will find three generous sized bedrooms. Master has large double closet and southwest facing window. Four piece bathroom with fabulous soaker tub to help unwind from your day. Basement is finished with den/bonus/workout room as well as three piece bath/laundry room. Separate handyman work area with abundant space for deepfreezer/storage. Mature treed lot with minimal maintenance. Step out your front door and transit will take you to your destination. Walk to schools and amenities. What else is there to think about? Phone xxx-xxxx for a viewing, but make sure your bags are packed. Freehold/No Fees. Realtors welcome.

Like Winning the Lottery

We were successful in our bid to get the house we were looking at.
Talk about nerves, haggling back and forth, possession date this that and the other....

Now begins the task of de-cluttering our house to put it on the market.
Oy.
They (the naysayers) say that this time of the year is not the best time to sell.
I'm out to prove them wrong.

I'll keep you posted.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Who Me?? Impulsive???

My husband will probably laugh reading this, at least I can make his day!!
I will admit, I can tend to be a bit impulsive when it comes to certain things.

This weekend I had just about had it up to here (insert hand at eye level) with my kitchen...well, mostly the cupboards. They are very dated. So we decided to go to Home Depot and price out a few things, like cupboards and such.

Then we got to talking about how it would be great to have more room on our main living level.
We have the bedrooms upstairs with the computer room, but the main floor is compartmentalized so that if Paden is playing with his toys, it is to the exclusion of doing anything else in that space. Wouldn't it be great if we had more room on the main floor?...so now we're talkin' major reno here....if we knock out this wall and extend this to here...blah blah blah....you get the idea.

So by the time we had all that laid out, my very sage husband errs in saying, 'Honey, for what we're trying to do here, maybe we should look at what's out on the market'....well, that's all I needed to hear!! LOL Lets' Go!

The real estate market has dropped off a bit, which is good for us.
There are alot of well priced houses out there that with the sale of our current house (plus a modest profit of course), we may be able to get into something newer for the same money...sweet.

Well, I'll keep you posted.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Steve Austin

So we're driving in the Tuscon and Paden says, 'Mom, I bet I can run faster than the truck'...
Really....
'Who are you? The six million dollar man???', I asked.
'Nope, I'm the hundred dollar man. Give me a hundred dollars and I'll run faster than the truck'....
Only from a five year old.


'Pick a number between 1 and 20', he says...
'Okay, 16', says Mark.
'Now you pick Mom'....
'Okay, 13', says I.
'....And I pick 2', says Paden.
'Who wins???' I ask, already knowing what the answer will be...

'Me', says Paden....
'What was the number you picked??', I ask.
'Five'......
....at least he gave us a sporting chance.

Thursday, November 8, 2007

I'll Take Music Lyrics for $200 Alex....

Here are the answers to the previous blahg...




  1. Yazoo - Don't Go

  2. Rascal Flatts (Tom Cochrane) - Life is a Highway

  3. Smash Mouth - Walkin on the Sun

  4. Republica - Drop Dead Gorgeous

  5. Corrine Bailey Rae - Just Like a Star (you MUST take a listen...probably my new favorite)

  6. Carl Douglas - Kung Fu Fighting

  7. Garbage - Stupid Girl

  8. Madonna - Hung Up

  9. Sheryl Crow - Good is Good

  10. Jesse Cook (Crowded House) - Fall at Your Feet

  11. Gipsy Kings - Balie

  12. Hilary Duff - Stranger (my ex's theme song....Ack!! Did I say that with my outside voice???LOL)

  13. Berg Matraca - Back in the Saddle

  14. Stabbing Westward - Save Yourself

  15. Van Morrison - Into the Mystic

  16. Justin Timberlake - Love Stoned

  17. Simply Red - Sunrise

  18. James Morrison - You Give Me Something

  19. Christina Aguilera - Candyman

  20. KT Tunstall - Suddenly I See



...guess it was just luck of the draw that none of my son's 'Crazy Frog' songs popped up!!! heehee

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Don't Forget the Lyrics....

You can blame this one on my sister Danie...

I am so in need of updating my iTunes (the idea is to set your iTunes on shuffle and see what comes up)...this took alot more time than I thought it would, but try to guess the name of the song and the artist...the answers will be posted in the next blog.

1. Came in from the city walked into the door
I turned around when I heard the sound of footsteps on the floor
Love just like addiction now I'm hooked on you
I need some time to get it right
Your love gonna see me through

2. Life's like a road that you travel on
When there's one day here and the next day gone
Sometimes you bend, sometimes you stand
Sometimes you turn your back to the wind

3. It ain't no joke
I'd like to buy the world a toke
And teach the world to sing in perfect harmony
And teach the world to snuff the fires and the liars

4. Backward words he got 'em
Shut up I’m talking
This time you'll listen
But when I look at you you're forgiven

5. Just like a star across my sky,
Just like an angel off the page,
You have appeared to my life,
Feel like I'll never be the same,

6. Everybody was Kung Fu fighting, (C'mon, hua whoo-ha)
those kids were fast as lightning. (Ha, whoo-cha)
In fact it was a little bit frightening, (Hua, hua-hua)
but they fought with expert timing. (Ha)

7. you pretend you're high
pretend you're bored
pretend you're anything
just to be adored

8. Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly
Time goes by so slowly

9. Good is good and bad is bad
But you don't know which one you had
She put your books out on the sidewalk
Now they're blowing round
But they won't help you when you're down

10. I’m really close tonight
And I feel like I’m moving inside her
Lying in the dark
And I think that I’m beginning to know her

11. Cuando ski maria dolores
Cuando ski quei mal d'amore
Cuando ski quei mal a su vera
Cuando ski me va al dottore

12. Nobody believes me when I tell them that you're out of your mind.
Nobody believes me when I tell them that there's so much you hide.
You treat me like a queen when we go out, wanna show everyone what our love's about.
All wrapped up in me whenever there is a crowd,But when no ones around;

13. I came down from the Cadillac dude ranch, health spa
Nestled on the edge of town
For fourteen days I've been herbal wrapped, mud packed
Now I'm bustin' out

14. I know your life is empty
And you hate to face this world alone
So you're searching for an angel
Someone who can make you whole

15. We were born before the wind
Also younger than the sun
Ere the bonnie boat was won as we sailed into the mystic
Hark, now hear the sailors cry

16. She grabs the yellow bottle
She likes the way it hits her lips
She gets to the bottom
It sends her on a trip so right
She might be goin' home with me tonight

17. As I look into your eyes I see the sunrise
The light behind your face helps me realise
Will we sleep and sometimes love until the moon shines
Maybe the next time Ill be yours and maybe youll be mine

18. You want to stay with me in the morning
You want to hold me while I sleep
I was meant to tread the water
But now I've gotten in too deep

19. I met him out for dinner on a Friday night
He really got me workin' up an appetite
He had tattoos up and down his arm
There's nothin' more dangerous than a boy with charm

20. Her face is a map of the world Is a map of the world
You can see she's a beautiful girl She's a beautiful girl
And everything around her is a silver pool of light The people who surround her feel the benefit of it
It makes you calm She holds you captivated in her palm

No cheating~~

Monday, November 5, 2007

Fall Back Spring Ahead

Daylight Saving Time

what a load of malarky...I fail to see the benefit.
At least I wasn't late/early for anything this weekend. Although it seems that I reminded anyone I came across 'don't forget to turn your clocks back on Saturday'...geez, I must have sounded like a looney tune.

I mean, really, come on. Why do we have to do this in the first place???
It's dark at 5:30 at night!
It was nice to be able to see where i was going this morning, but I'd rather have the light at the end of the day.

Make a 'vee' with your thumb and forefinger, put them together to get the big 'W'...as in, WHATEVER!

Friday, November 2, 2007

Q&A, continued from Earth to Danie

I'll play along...my sister did hers and passed it on.


Favorite movie – Silverado
Last movie I saw- last 'good' movie...Stranger than Fiction...two thumbs WAY up.
Favorite TV show - I would say Damages too, but I can't get that here...so CSI 'the original'
Favorite type of pen- Sarasa in Hunter Green
What do you struggle with – Who???oh what....gotcha...um, keeping my house tidy.
How many siblings- Two YOUNGER sisters
You are the oldest/middle/youngest sibling - Oldest/Wisest? (uh, yeah right)
Pet's names – Our cat Comet...after the book Comet's Nine Lives. And a Japanese fighting fish who used to be called Nemo and is now Scott.
Favorite breakfast – OOO tough one...I'd have to say eggs bennie with smoked salmon instead of the ham
Favorite salad - Greek
Favorite desert – not much for desert, probably vanilla ice cream
Favorite holiday – Canada Day
If you could do anything - visit Scotland
A living celebrity you would meet – celebrity is as celebrity does...Stephen Hawkins
A deceased celebrity you would meet – How far back can I go....how bout Merlin?
Your birthday – 11.16
Favorite pie – Key Lime
Favorite pastry – Mini Chocolate Eclairs
Favorite Christmas song – Anything by Bing Crosby or Johnny Mathis
Favorite soda – Diet Coke with Lime
Most annoying thing people do – email chain mail - hands down.
What did you do last night – cooked dinner for my boys, watched CSI..and Smallville
Any tattoos? - Yes
Pierced ears? - Yes
Eye color - Green
Black or brown accessories (shoes/bags) – Black
Favorite color - Green
The walls in your bedroom are –Creme with brown suede.
You can't wait for this show to start this fall – I can take or leave TV, but probably Mythbusters
If you could have one skill it would be – predicting winning lotto numbers? heh heh


Ok...copy and past it into your own blogs...let's see your answers!